February 5, 2020

50 days in Chastity

This Saturday I unlocked Slave R, after 50 days locked for me. It was amazing to be able to guide him through this experience, and watch him become more submissive and compliant with every day. I'm so proud of him for what he did for me.Thank you Slave R, for writing this feedback on your experience. I hope this is helpful to any sub considering a period of chastity...

Your First 50 Days in Chastity: A Survival Guide

“Know that this changes nothing. You may be out of the cage, but you belong to me now and I decide when you go back in” Those were the words from Mistress Adreena as she unlocked my chastity device after the longest period I had ever gone - 50 days.I’m far from a chastity cage veteran - my only other experience was for Locktober, of which we just about completed 3 full weeks. So this has been quite a ‘thrown in at the deep end’ experience, that I’ve somehow, through research, trial and error and lots of communicating, actually managed to thoroughly enjoy. So much so, that Mistress suggested that I would put my thoughts down for her blog, some of the things I’ve learned in the last 50 days that other subs new to chastity could find of value.

Get a Date in the Diary

Undoubtedly the most daunting moment was being locked for the first time. We weren’t going for ongoing lockup, there was a specific period that we had in mind - from mid December till the end of January. I had several moments in the first week of experiencing utter claustrophobic panic at the thought of more than 40 days to go. From my research, I think this is quite natural for long term chastity. Mistress suggested very early on that we put a date in the diary for the unlocking. Every day then felt like we were working towards a goal, rather than perpetual unending torment.

Your First Device is Unlikely to be Your Long Term Device

Chastity fiction would have you believe that any random device can be locked on any slave for any period of time without difficulty. I’m actually on my fourth device since October! It’s a real trial and error situation as everybody has different routines, reactions and budgets that determine the sort of device for you. My first device was a cheap mould that snapped after 4 days. Another device had air vents that caused chafing and a third just kept falling off me. But the Holy Trainer from House of Denial proved to be almost perfect for long term wear, discrete under your clothes and sturdy to cope with yoga and cycling. So don’t get disheartened if your first device isn’t right for you - it’s a process to find the right one for your body and lifestyle.

To purchase your House of Denial chastity device, please visit https://www.houseofdenial.com

Effective Communication is Essential

Chastity on your own can be quite a lonely experience. Feelings of abandonment or being ignored can often be amplified many times over when locked in a cage. So I have been incredibly lucky to have found in Mistress Adreena, someone who has encouraged me to reach out when I was having emotional or physical challenges that were becoming a little too real. However, that hasn’t unleashed an impulse to send 15 messages an hour. Actually the permission to contact her is something I have been desperately keen to protect from overuse. I want her to always feel that my communications leave her with a positive vibe. So even in the tough times, I’m searching for a way to communicate the things I’ve learnt about myself or how much I appreciate her support.

Research Chastity ‘Life Hacks’

An amazing resource is the Chastity subreddit. Despite an overwhelming abundance of gents sharing images of their junk locked up, the advice threads are where I found all the little life hacks. Do your research to find how not just to survive the experience but make it enjoyable. Yes it’s a pain to accommodate some of these hacks but after a while they become routine and absolutely essential for long term wear. If you’re wondering what some of mine are:

  • Don’t drink before bedtime. A full bladder increases the chance of nocturnal erections, inevitably waking you up. If you do wake, go to the toilet immediately rather than try to wait the erection out. The first few weeks are the worst at night, but stick with it and it gets easier to sleep throughout.
  • Get a cleaning routine every day at least. Trust me - leaving it more than a day and you start to feel really funky which can affect your moods. Don’t use too much soap - bacteria seems to love leftover soap film. In fact I just use water from the shower nozzle and use cotton buds inserted at the top and bottom, and roll them around the circumference a few times. Clear plastic devices are far easier to see if they’re clean than coloured ones.
  • Once I’m clean, I dry throughly (or leave it to dry naturally), then add lotion. One dab around the inside of the ring morning and night prevents chafing for me. I’ve read that lotions can soften the skin, so you may want an alternative like Vaseline, which stays in place a longer time.
Celebrate the Unlocking

We made the unlocking quite a big deal. A whole session built around this event. We shared a bottle of Prosecco, in the way Mistress prefers 😉 and I was made to thoroughly earn the right to have the cage unlocked. But that moment was not filmed, it was purely between the two of us and felt so special because of it. A 50 day experience that was a process in drawing me closer to a wonderful Lady who had led me through one of the most formidable but fulfilling challenges in my kink life. The almost ritualistic nature of this session felt like a formal marking of a milestone on our shared journey. So when Mistress announced at the end of this amazing session that she would be taking control of the next stage of our chastity adventure at some point at her discretion, it was a natural progression and one I embrace wholeheartedly.Thank you, Mistress. I couldn’t have completed this without you.